Santa Banta Jokes

What a relief

Banta tripped on the stairs and broke his leg. The doctor put a cast on it and warned that he wasn't to use the stairs until the cast came off.

The weeks later he removed the cast and pronounced him well on the way to recovery.

"Oh good," Banta responded. "Is it all right for me to walk the stairs now?"

"Yes," said the doctor, "if you promise to be careful."

"I can't tell you what a relief it will be," he sighed. "It was such a nuisance crawling outside and shinnying up and down that drainpipe all the time!"

Money well spent

Santa walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Was I in here last night?"

"You certainly were," replies the bartender.

"And did I spend a lot of money?" Santa asked.

"You spent over Rs. 10000," replies the bartender.

"Thank god for that," says Santa, "I thought I'd wasted it."

Nice logic

Santa: What's the name of our PM?
Pappu: We don't have a PM in our country.

Santa: Shut up! Tell me the name of our PM?
Pappu: Okay dad, first you tell me the model no. of our typewriter?

Santa: We don't have a typewriter.
Pappu: We have one in the store-room.

Santa: Oh... that one. We do have but that's not of any use why should I remember it's model no?
Pappu: My point exactly.

 

Mouse trap

Santa: I'm in a big trouble!

Banta: Why is that?

Santa: I saw a mouse in my house!

Banta: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap.

Santa: I don't have one.

Banta: Well then, buy one.

Santa: Can't afford one.

Banta: I can give you mine if you want.

Santa: That sounds good.

Banta: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap.

Santa: I don't have any cheese.

Banta: Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap.

Santa: I don't have oil.

Banta: Well, then put only a small piece of bread.

Santa I don't have bread.

Banta: Then what the hell is that mouse doing at your house???

Classic insult

Santa & a girl standing on the bus stop:

Santa to ladki: Nice lipstick.

Girl: Thanks.

Santa: Nice top and jeans

Girl: Thanks.

Santa: Nice ear-rings

Girl: Thanks.

Santa: Nice neckless.

Girl: Thank you so much BHAIYA.

Santa: Very strange, phir bhi tum sundar nahi lag rahi ho.

Not at home

A visitor to Santa, "Which is Mr Banta's flat?"

Santa: Please come with me.

The visitor is taken on stairs to the 3rd floor.

The visitor rings the bell and there is no response. He rings it again and again and still no one answers. Visitor: I think he is not in. Santa: Yeah, he has gone out. He'll be back in the evening!

Santa Singing

Santa Singh and Banta Singh were sitting on a tree and Santa Singh was singing a song.After 4 songs Santa Singh hung himself upside down and started singing again.
Banta Singh : Santa Singh, what is the matter with you? Why are you hanging upside down?
Santa Singh : I am singing the B side.

Blood bank

Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank.
Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled Red Wine,
Happily they drank & went away.

Next day Headline aai: Blood Bank lutya gya.

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