What a relief

Banta tripped on the stairs and broke his leg. The doctor put a cast on it and warned that he wasn't to use the stairs until the cast came off.

The weeks later he removed the cast and pronounced him well on the way to recovery.

"Oh good," Banta responded. "Is it all right for me to walk the stairs now?"

"Yes," said the doctor, "if you promise to be careful."

"I can't tell you what a relief it will be," he sighed. "It was such a nuisance crawling outside and shinnying up and down that drainpipe all the time!"

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New chauffeur

Santa hired a new chauffeur.

Jeeto asked the chauffer to take her out for shopping and was very shaken by the experience.

Back home, she pleaded with Santa, "Please dear, you must sack this new chauffeur at once. He is so rash he nearly killed me three times this morning."

"Darling, don't be so hasty," replied Santa, "give him another chance."

Money well spent

Santa walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Was I in here last night?"

"You certainly were," replies the bartender.

"And did I spend a lot of money?" Santa asked.

"You spent over Rs. 10000," replies the bartender.

"Thank god for that," says Santa, "I thought I'd wasted it."

English courtesy

Banta was once visiting London. After a long walk in one of very fancy clean streets of London, he found himself needing a toilet badly. After a long search he could not find any, and eventually couldn’t control and chose a silent corner of a clean street to release himself. Once he had just started, a police official approached him,
Hey, What do you think you re doing here?
Banta: sorry I have to "Pee"
Officer: No PP here okay? Follow me...
The Police officer took him to a beautiful garden nearby with lots of grass, flowers and singing birds around....
Officer: Pee here.. have a nice day.
Banta: Oh sir ... that is very nice of you, is this English courtesy ?
Officer: No... This is Indian Embassy !!

Car Starts with Tea

Sardar: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'.
Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.

Womans ears

Banta lost both ears in an accident. No plastic surgeon could offer him a solution. He heard of a very good one in Mumbai, and went to him.
The new surgeon examined him, thought a while, and said, " Yes, I can put you right."
After the operation, bandages off, stitches out, he goes to his hotel.
The morning after, in a rage, he calls his surgeon, and yells, "You bastard, you gave me a woman`s ears."
"Well, an ear is an ear, it makes no difference whether it is a man`s or a woman`s."
"You`re wrong, I hear everything, but I don`t understand a thing!"

Sardar and Hidden Camera

Jasmeet caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room.

Jasmeet : “What are you searching for?”

Santa : “Hidden camera!”

Jasmeet : “And what makes you think that there are hidden camera here?”

Santa : “That guy on tv knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying, You are watching the Star World channel. How does he know that?”

Blind date

Banta sets up Santa to go on a blind date with a friend of his. But Santa is a little worried about going out with someone he's never seen before.
"What do I do if she's ugly?" says Santa, "I'll be stuck with her all night."
"Don't worry," Banta says, "just go up to her door and meet her first. If you like what you see, then everything goes as planned. If you don't just shout 'Aaaaaaaaauuuuuuuggghhh!' and fake an asthma attack."
So that night, Santa knocks at the girl's door and when she comes out he is awe-struck at how beautiful and sexy she is.
He's about to speak when the girl suddenly shouts: ..."Aaaaaaaaaaauuugguuughhh!"