Two Thousand Miles

There is a California dude going through a desert. He's wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his walkman.

He's having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching.

He stops the Arabs and ask them cheerfully: "Hey dudes how far is the sea?" They look at each other and say: "Two thousand miles!"

And he says: "Wow what a cool beach!!!"

Add Comments
Read Related Jokes >

Going to the Zoo

Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally his mother talked his reluctant father into taking him.

"So how was it?" his mother asked when they returned home.

"Great," Little Johnny replied.

"Did you and your father have a good time?" asked his mother.

"Yeah, Daddy especially liked it," exclaimed Little Johnny excitedly, "especially when one of the animals came home at 30 to 1!"

My marble

Two boys were playing marble and suddenly rushed to the hospital.

Smaller boy told to the doctor, “I have swallowed a marble.”

Doctor: “I see, Is this your brother with you?” asked to the older boy.

The other boy replied “No, I own the marble.”

Little girl and boy

Two babies were sitting in their cribs, when one baby shouted to the other, “Are you a little girl or a little boy?”

“I don’t know,” replied the other baby giggling.”What do you mean, you don’t know?” said the first baby.

“I mean I don’t know how to tell the difference,” was the reply.

Well, I do,” said the first baby chuckling. “I’ll climb into your crib and find out.”

He carefully climbed himself into the other baby’s crib, then quickly disappeared beneath the blankets. After a couple of minutes, he resurfaced with a big grin on his face.

“You’re a little girl, and I’m a little boy,” he said proudly.

“You’re ever so clever,” cooed the baby girl, “but how can you tell?”

“It’s quite easy really,” replied the baby boy, “You’ve got pink socks and I’ve got blue ones.”

 

Afraid of the Dark

A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, “Mama, I don’t want to go out there. It’s dark.”

The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. “You don’t have to be afraid of the dark,” she explained. “God is out there. He’ll look after you and protect you.”

The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, “Are you sure he’s out there?”

“Yes, I’m sure. He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him,” she said.

The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called, “God? If you’re out there, would you please hand me the broom?”

Police Enquiry

Police: where do u live?
Me: with my parents
Police: where does ur parents live?
Me: with me
Police: where do u all live?
Me: together
Police: where is ur house?
Me: next to my neighbors house
Police: where is your neighbors house?
Me: if i tell you u wont believe me.
Police: tell me
Me: next to my house

Change of mind

Mrs. Sullivan and her little daughter Patty were outside the church watching all the comings and goings of a wedding.

After the photographs had been taken, everyone had driven off to the reception, and all the excitement was over.

Patty asked her mother, "Why did the bride change her mind, Mommy?"

"What do you mean, change her mind?" asked Mrs. Sullivan.

"Well`, said the child, "she went into the church with one man and came out with another!"

Home work

One day teacher asked Sam that did his father help him with his homework.
Sam simply said that “No, he did it all by himself”!

Category: Jokes for Kids