Boss: Where were you born?
Sardar: India ..
Boss: which part?
Sardar: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India
Dead men dont bleed
Banta thought he was dead, but in reality he was very much alive.His delusion became such a problem that his family finally paid for him to see a psychiatrist.
The psychiatrist spent many laborious sessions trying to convince Banta that he is still alive. Nothing seemed to work.
Finally the doctor tried one last approach. He took out his medical books and proceeded to show Banta that dead men don’t bleed. After hours of tedious study, Banta seemed convinced that dead men don’t bleed.
“Do you now agree that dead men don’t bleed?” the doctor asked.
“Yes, I do,” Banta replied.
“Very well, then,” the doctor said.
He took out a pin and pricked the patient’s finger. Out came a trickle of blood.
The doctor asked, “What does that tell you?”
“Oh my goodness!” Banta exclaimed as he stared incredulously at his finger … “Dead men do bleed!!”
Next Door Neighbors Phone Number
Santa Singh wanted to speak with his buddy Banta Singh and called him.
“Hello, is this Banta Singh?”
“No, who is this? Not sure who are you looking for.” came the reply.
Santa followed by saying – “Is this 212-100-1001?”
The guy replied, “Sorry, it’s not. You got 212-100-1002.”
Santa says – “Oh, I see. Can you please call Banta Singh from your next door?”
Santa's wife, Jeeto, got into a terrible car accident. Her face was burned terribly. The doctors couldn't use any skin on her body to graft onto her face for reconstructive surgery.
As a result, Santa offered the skin off his butt for the surgery. She had the surgery and was as beautiful after as she was before the surgery.
One night Jeeto and Santa were watching TV when she broke down crying.
"What's the matter?" Santa asked.
Jeeto said "I can't believe you did this for me."
Santa hugged her and replied, "Don't worry about it, I love you, and I'd do anything for you."
But how will I ever repay you?" she asked.
To which Santa replied, "You don't need to repay me... you wouldn't believe the satisfaction I get every time I see your mom kiss you on the cheek."
Watch less T.V
While visiting Santa’s house, Banta noticed that he had replaced his usual TV with a smaller model.
Thinking that perhaps the larger set has broken down, Banta asked why the small one was there.
“Oh,” Santa replied, “I have decided to watch less T.V.”
Banta went to the emergency room with the tip of his index finger blown off.
"How did this happen?" the doctor asked.
"Well I was trying to commit suicide," Banta replied.
The doctor asked, "Trying to commit suicide by shooting your finger?"
"No, silly! First I put the gun on my head and I thought my face would look horrible, then I put it in my mouth and I thought I just paid Rs. 1,000 to get my teeth straightened. So then I put the gun in my ear and I thought this is going to make a loud noise, so I put my finger in my other ear before I pulled the trigger."