Phone to school

Pupil (on phone): My son has a bad cold and won’t be able to come to school today.
School Secretary: Who is this?
Pupil: This is my father speaking!

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School teacher message to parents

An elementary school teacher sends this note to
All parents on the first day of school.

"If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school,
I will promise not to believe everything your child says happens at home.

Sun is closer

Teacher: Which one is closer, Sun or Africa?
Johnny: Sun
Teacher: Why?
Johnny: We can see the sun all the time, but can’t see Africa.

Homework

“Johnny, where’s your homework?” Miss Martin said sternly to the little boy while holding

out her hand.
“My dog ate it,” was his solemn response.
“Johnny, I’ve been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that?”
“It’s true, Miss Martin, I swear it is,” insisted Johnny. “I had to smear it with honey,

but I finally got him to eat it.”

 

Ten million dollars

The Old Professor poses the following problem to one of his classes:
“A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars. One-fifth is to go to his daughter,

one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his brother, and the rest to his wife. Now,

what does each get?”
After a very long silence in the classroom, Little Paul raises his hand and says, “A

lawyer?”

Post box

Teacher to students: can anyone tell a word which has more than 1000 letters in it?
Sam suddenly stands up and said “postbox”!

 

Talker

Teacher: "Ramu, you talk a lot !"
Ramu: "It's a family tradition".
Teacher: "What do you mean?"
Ramu: "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher: "What about your mother?"
Ramu: "She's a woman".

Category: School Jokes