A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red “H” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” asks the doctor. “Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we make love,” she replies.
A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a blue “Y” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” asks the doctor. “Oh, my boyfriend goes to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when we make love,” she replies.
A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green “M” on her chest. “Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?” asks the doctor. “No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin. Why do you ask?”
Santa saw that his friend Banta was very depressed.
"What happened?" asked Santa.
"Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . "
"How come ?" "Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and Australia was being shown live on TV. I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet."
"But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go?"
"Yaar, I bet on the highlights too "
JAPANESE PIZZA PEPPORONI
An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip. He hates Japanese food, so he asks the concierge at his hotel if there's any place where he can get a pizza.
The concierge tells him he will call for delivery to his room and takes his order.
Thirty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up. The businessman takes the pizza and starts sneezing uncontrollably.
He asks the delivery man, "What the heck did you put on this pizza?"
The delivery man bows deeply and says, "Just what you ordered -- pepper only."
A Wife Hit Her Husband
A Wife Hit Her Husband With Frying Pan:
Husband: What was that for?
Wife: I found a paper in your Pocket, with the name Jenny on it.
Husband: I played a Race last week and Jenny was the name of my Horse.
Next day, Wife again hit him with the Frying Pan.
Wife: Your Horse is on the Phone.
Heart attack message
Double heart attack message by a girl to a boy: 1st SMS: Let`s break up now, it`s all over. 2nd SMS: Sorry, Sorry, Sorry! That was not for you.
Sardar and Hidden Camera
Jasmeet caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room.
Jasmeet : “What are you searching for?”
Santa : “Hidden camera!”
Jasmeet : “And what makes you think that there are hidden camera here?”
Santa : “That guy on tv knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying, You are watching the Star World channel. How does he know that?”
A better warranty
An angry motorist went back to a garage where he’d purchased an expensive battery for his car six months earlier.
“Listen,” the motorist grumbled to the owner of the garage, “when I bought that battery you said it would be the last battery my car would ever need. It died after only six months!”
“Sorry,” apologized the garage owner. “I didn’t think your car would last longer than that.”