"Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has no heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains."
Women are like internet viruses they enter your life, scan your pocket, edit your mind, download their problems, delete your smile...
I can't decide this Halloween whether to go as a slutty witch, a slutty nurse, a slutty schoolgirl, or just a total slut...
Apparently beer contains female hormones. After you drink enough you can neither drive nor shut the hell up!
Your friendship means so much to me that... When you cry, I cry. When you laugh, I laugh. When you jump out a window, I laugh some more.
"Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work."
Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter... people the opposite.
Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
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