Betting Banta

Santa saw that his friend Banta was very depressed.
"What happened?" asked Santa.
"Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . "
"How come ?" "Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and Australia was being shown live on TV. I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet."
"But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go?"
"Yaar, I bet on the highlights too "

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Keyboard Alphabets

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the

computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it

alright.

 

The exam

Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination.
He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes,

and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window.

He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch

follow suit.

The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.

Oye, I am only following the instructions 'Answer in brief'.

Bon Appetit

Santa was spending some of his hard-earned cash on a luxury cruise and was given a table

with a Frenchman.

At their first meal together, the Frenchman said, "Bon appetit!"

Before the next meal commenced the performance was repeated.

"Bon appetit," said the Frenchman.

"Santa Ji," replied Santa.

After this had happened at every meal for three days, Santa was getting fed up, and told a fellow traveller about it.

"He tells me his name is Bon Appetit and I tell him my name is Santa, and then at the next meal, we start all over again."

The fellow traveller laughed and explained to Santa that the Frenchman was not introducing himself and that 'Bon appetit' meant "Good appetite", or "I hope that you enjoy your meal!"

Santa breathed a sigh of relief on receiving this information. Next morning, at breakfast,

Santa greeted the Frenchman, "Bon appetite."

The Frenchman nodded politely and said, "Santa Ji."

Dead men dont bleed

Banta thought he was dead, but in reality he was very much alive.His delusion became such a problem that his family finally paid for him to see a psychiatrist.

The psychiatrist spent many laborious sessions trying to convince Banta that he is still alive. Nothing seemed to work.

Finally the doctor tried one last approach. He took out his medical books and proceeded to show Banta that dead men don’t bleed. After hours of tedious study, Banta seemed convinced that dead men don’t bleed.

“Do you now agree that dead men don’t bleed?” the doctor asked.

“Yes, I do,” Banta replied.

“Very well, then,” the doctor said.

He took out a pin and pricked the patient’s finger. Out came a trickle of blood.

The doctor asked, “What does that tell you?”

“Oh my goodness!” Banta exclaimed as he stared incredulously at his finger … “Dead men do bleed!!”

An Identity Problem

Santa and Banta sitting in the bar at Raja Sansi Airport, Amritsar.

"I've come to meet my brother," said the Santa. "He's due to fly in from Canada in an hour's time. It's his first trip home in forty years."

"Will you be able to recognize him?" asked the Banta.

"I'm sure I won't," said Santa, "after all, he's been away for a long time."

"I wonder if he'll recognize you?" said the Banta.

"Of course he will," said Santa. "Sure, I haven't been away at all."

Elevator

Santa was visiting the big city for the first time. He checks in at the hotel, and the bell boy takes his bags. He follows the boy, and as the door closes, he looks around and shakes his fist at him.

`Young man, I may be from the village and unfamiliar with the city, but that don`t mean I`m stupid! I paid good money, and this room won`t do at all! It`s too small, and without proper ventilation! Why there`s not even a bed!`

The bellboy looks at Santa and says, `Sir, this isn`t your room, it`s the elevator!`

Time

Santa and Banta were studying late night. Their watch was not working.
Santa: What is the time? Banta picks up a stone and throws it to the gate of neighbour's house. A lady from neighbour's house shouted: You fools, it is 3 'o clock. Why don't you sleep?