Funny Quotes
Comparsion of elder and younger
"Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has no heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains."
Opposite of profound truth
"The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth."
Monkeys type writers
"I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon."
Richest people
"Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work."
Multiple personalities
Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
Men
Men are like puppies, adorable, then you take them home and they crap over everything you ever treasured.
Friendship
Your friendship means so much to me that... When you cry, I cry. When you laugh, I laugh. When you jump out a window, I laugh some more.
Penis and a brain
"God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time."
